i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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