please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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