Need sex. Gaining weight.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
