doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Randomize
