WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
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