There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
