Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
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