just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
