well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
