I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving