thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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