Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
