Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
High School Students Hilariously Rank Celebrities By Their Stank For Class Project
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
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Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat