Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
