My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
So here I am, sexting at work.
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