i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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