At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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