Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
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