Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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