it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
