Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Randomize
