He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
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