you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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