Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
