careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
