So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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