She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The feeling are messing with the penis
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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