Fine. I'll sleep in my office
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
