i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
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