I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Randomize
