He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
