"it" just moved
my mouth tastes like poor choices
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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