once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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