yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize