but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
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