I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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