arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Randomize
