In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
