for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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