So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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