I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize