You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Holy sore nipples Batman
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
