just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Randomize
