Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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