I accidentally had phone sex last night
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize