Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
