Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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