Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
She is in my trunk
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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