i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
