So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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